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How to deal with dementia patient (my mom)?

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zhengmuu View Drop Down
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    Posted: 21 Nov 2018 at 9:48am
I care for my mom who was diagnosed with Dementia's disease 3ys ago. I promised I would look after her, but I am exhausted and my job makes me have no time to rest.I really don’t know where to start especially as she keeps saying she doesn’t need any help. What can I do?Ermm
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planetuntiil View Drop Down
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First of all, why wouldn't she want any help? I mean its not like you're gonna send her to a nursery or the old folks home right? We owe them our life so doing so would break their heart. Plus not all nursery are good. Some have really bad service
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Originally posted by planetuntiil planetuntiil wrote:

First of all, why wouldn't she want any help? I mean its not like you're gonna send her to a nursery or the old folks home right? We owe them our life so doing so would break their heart. Plus not all nursery are good. Some have really bad service

Yeah i agree with this. TT should not consider that. We wouldn't want to have case like this happening all over again



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planetuntiil View Drop Down
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Originally posted by shadajie shadajie wrote:

Originally posted by planetuntiil planetuntiil wrote:

First of all, why wouldn't she want any help? I mean its not like you're gonna send her to a nursery or the old folks home right? We owe them our life so doing so would break their heart. Plus not all nursery are good. Some have really bad service

Yeah i agree with this. TT should not consider that. We wouldn't want to have case like this happening all over again





Where was thatCry ?? I cant watch stuffs like this. I get too emotional. I hope the people who sent his or her loved ones to an old folks home can see this video and realize that the possibilities are there. There are always other alternatives
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didicempaka View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote didicempaka Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Nov 2018 at 3:54pm
Originally posted by shadajie shadajie wrote:

Originally posted by planetuntiil planetuntiil wrote:

First of all, why wouldn't she want any help? I mean its not like you're gonna send her to a nursery or the old folks home right? We owe them our life so doing so would break their heart. Plus not all nursery are good. Some have really bad service

Yeah i agree with this. TT should not consider that. We wouldn't want to have case like this happening all over again



this is so sad.. i wonder how his kid feels leaving him at the old folks home expecting the care taker would take care they parents but in reality their parents had been abused. i hope they take him back home..
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didicempaka View Drop Down
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Originally posted by zhengmuu zhengmuu wrote:

I care for my mom who was diagnosed with Dementia's disease 3ys ago. I promised I would look after her, but I am exhausted and my job makes me have no time to rest.I really don’t know where to start especially as she keeps saying she doesn’t need any help. What can I do?Ermm

dementia is a serious disease. dementia patients cant be left alone they could harm theirself. i think if you looking for somebady just to take a look at her maybe you can hire a maid perhaps? 
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amigobro View Drop Down
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Originally posted by didicempaka didicempaka wrote:

dementia is a serious disease. dementia patients cant be left alone they could harm theirself. i think if you looking for somebady just to take a look at her maybe you can hire a maid perhaps? 

He could.. But i would suggest DONT. As you mentioned dementia is a serious disease so dementia patients should be monitor and taken care of properly. I doubt that housemaid would be qualify to take care of dementia patients believe me. Last time my maid ran away because she cant take it any longer taking care of my in law.Cry
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migujem View Drop Down
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Originally posted by zhengmuu zhengmuu wrote:

I care for my mom who was diagnosed with Dementia's disease 3ys ago. I promised I would look after her, but I am exhausted and my job makes me have no time to rest.I really don’t know where to start especially as she keeps saying she doesn’t need any help. What can I do?Ermm

Although I do not know how serious is your mom's dementia...

I think it is best for you to have a short break from all the responsibilities. it is hard to care for someone while being tired and when things get mixed up, we would have a higher tendency to be sensitive and in a negative mood. 

Would your mom feel at ease when you are juggling around here and there.. sometimes we need to take a few steps back in order to give more.  

But like other mentioned, I also would highly suggested that you look for some that could substitute your place. Some one that knows at least how to care for dementia patients and more importantly someone that you can rely onto..




Edited by migujem - 21 Nov 2018 at 5:11pm
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Kuruma View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kuruma Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Nov 2018 at 6:06pm

Story time..when my grandpa was still around... my mother's sibling would take turns on who to care for our grandpa... that way, my whole extended fam always have a gap for resting time, working time and family time. and because of the small time gap that we had, us family were abled to cherish the moments we took care of him instead of taking it as a burden. 

We were also very very lucky to have found a part timer that would stay for a few days when everyone is too busy. We offered her because she is a neighbour and we know her educational background... But I'm not sure if you have someone nearby that could look after him.. I would highly suggest u search for someone that majored in health and medical line.   

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jojomojo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Nov 2018 at 12:50pm
Good afternoon everyone,

I was facing the same thing last few years when my father was diagnosed with dementia. Exhausted juggling with work, family and personal time. Bcos we need constant eye on him, we decided to take part-timer. The first few did not really know how to handle dementia patients or what dementia is.  
I got the recommendation from an office friend of a website caregiverasia. They have flexible services, so you can try and look one that suits you and your mom's needs..
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